French quip was funniest moment

“Glen,

You can't imagine how I've waited for your reply. I think I find your lack of self awareness and irony even more enticing. Bundle me into your Mercedes Sprinter and run away with me.”

“@Marog. Where do you get i'm a tattoed man called Glen from? I don't know whether your being facetious, or your just rather dim. Are you assuming then, that i'm a tattooed man because i have poorer grammer than you and answered you back in what you call 'a brutish manner'? So you think by getting you name wrong is being 'brutish'? Really?? Did you not think your posts aimed at me, was the slightest bit rude? Rude in a degrading, and demoralizing way? Follow you around? I think you're deluded. I think you will find this is a public site Morag. One could say you are following me around. From your long post, rabbiting on about complete c**p, one wonders how sad one must be. Is one a frustrated writer? Are you hoping the Leicester Mercury will give you a job as the new Fred Leicester? Or are you just rude and obnoxious to people in the hope of someone replying to your postings?
Do you take great pleasure in being so abhorrent and demoralizing someone for not having the privilege to obtain such as good academic background as yourself? I beg your pardon for writing as speak: In my mother tongue. (Leicester accent) People are here to write a comment, not to spoken to in a condescending manner by a self-righteous chump!
I might not have such perfect grammer and puctuation as you. So what!. At least i have common sense and run my own sucessful business, unlike you, it seems, that has no life and nothing of any value to say.”

“I appear to have acquired a certain amount of unwarranted attention just recently. Glenfield 123 seems to have been tracking down my posts and responding to them in some unexpected ways.

Some of his postings (I'm sure he's a Glen rather than a Glenda Field) have bordered on the offensive through hurling invective and addressing me in frankly abusive terms (Moron instead of Marog etc).

Others proved a little impenetrable. For example - "could you not be any more sanctimonious" To which the answer is, of course "No, I couldn't not be any more sanctimonious". If the question were "could you be any more sanctimonious" – which is what I think Glen meant – The answer would be "Yes". As I believe I've just demonstrated.

However this takes us off my central theme.

I've found myself responding in a rather unexpected manner to Glen's rather brutish postings.

I imagine him sitting at home, hammering at his keyboard with the gnarled, cracked, somewhat swarthy fingers of the working man. He is a man who may not have been well served by formal education, but has less than made up for this since.

And something stirs. An unexpected flush, a thrill not felt since my youth.

I've found myself musing on what sort of angry man Glen might be. Perhaps Oliver Mellors to my Constance; vibrant and vigorous. A man of fixed opinions regardless of the evidence. A man's man. Probably tattooed. Neither extensively or expensively, but just enough ink to mark him out as an individual.

Perhaps we could learn to be happy together. I could learn to give up angora Jaeger and Hobbs in favour of a Top Shop onesie? Rioja for shots? The Guardian for the Daily Express? I'll even take out a subscription to Heat and Hello.

A gal can dream can't she?”

“@Moron...sorry Morag. Please excuse my poor grammer. I thought i was making a comment on a story, not taking a grammer test!. May i suggest you go and get yourself a life, you jumped up little snob (county hall employee i'm assuming morag!!)”

“marog,the competence you exhibit in grammatical English is a credit to the education that you have recieved.I am sure your parents and teachers are proud of you.
A pity you seem to have missed something along the way.
It is called a sense of humour.
Surely you can see that this City is being run by comedians and "The Chuckle Brothers" is a good description of sups and porky.
Even the picture heading shows big pockets !”

“@Glenfield123

"To whom", not "to who". For "Dim wits that run this city" try "dimwits who run this city". "I take it your one..." Not "your". "You're" An abbreviation of "You are".

Otherwise, only one question or exclamation mark at a time is necessary.

I'm sure your spittle flecked diatribe would serve your rapier wit so much more effectively once you've honed your grammar.

@ Aristoc

That "capital F thing" is pretty central to the above letter.”

“glenfield..nice observation.Not a clue what "this capital F thing is about".But it is Saturday lunch !”

“@greydjames. Infantile and offensive?? To who?? Oh i know...the 2 dim wits that run this city!! I take it your one of their little chums...some people don't know how to take a joke.!”

“@ Aristoc - You're hilarious aren't you. Comments like yours are infantile and offensive. You want to take your puerile, irrelevant jibes elsewhere and spare them from those of us who like reasoned and sensible debate.

And this capital F thing is a very old one. This poor little girl, she was only 6, isn't the first to come up with that and she won't be the last.”

“Hey look at the picture that heads this article.Looks like soulsby and palmer to me.correct name .”